Pond Hopper

Possible C-Section

I had an appointment with my midwife yesterday.  The baby is breech (always has been) and she suspects due to his position, he will not make his natural turn for childbirth.  The result will be a c-section delivery.  I still have time, but if he hasn't turned by my next appointment in two weeks, she will start the wheels in motion and make an appointment with the OB to schedule a c-section.
Considering I just had surgery in October, this was not good news.  the last thing I want is to be cut again.  I had such a horrible experience with the last surgery and it's left me with a bit of a fear of ever having to go through it again.  Not to mention that a c-section birth is far from the birth plan Wayne and I have been working on.  I wanted the baby to go directly to me when he was born.  We had planned to request he be left on me and alone with us for the first 90 minutes after he was born to start the bonding processes and give him his first feed naturally.  I was so pleased when I found out that such requests were possible (as long as the birth went well) it sounded like such a beautiful experience -  I had no idea that if they place the baby on you after birth, they will make their way to the breast on their own to start the first feed (which usually takes place within the first hour or so).  This crawling reflex is only possible for a very short time after birth.  I was going to have the baby lie with me (skin on skin) close to my chest and allow him to feed when he was ready.  With a c-section, I won't even be able to hold him until I am out of recovery.  This breaks my heart.
I'm now 32 weeks pregnant (just started month 8).  If babies don't turn by week 35 - chances are they wont.  Keep your fingers crossed for me that the little guy cooperates and starts his decent soon.

The 4D ultrasound

We went for the 4D ultrasound on Saturday.  It was absolutely amazing! ( I've attached a photo, but if you'd like to see them all - click here for the photos and click here for the video). As you can see from the photo, it was really clear and we could get a good idea of what our little boy looks like.  I cried during a good part of it, just in awe of this little face - the face of my son.  I just can't believe it.  I am truly in love with this little life inside me and I can't wait to hold him.  This pregnancy has changed ever since - I thought I loved every movement before, but now it's even more amazing!  Sure, I have pain and very very swollen feet, but none of it bothers me too much any more.  It's all so worth it.  I am so excited and so thrilled.  Any woman who's feeling a bit fed up with being pregnant, should go through the experience of the 4d ultrasound because it renews the joy of it all over again!  I have 9 weeks to go (8 weeks according to my OB in the States) and I really can't wait!

A nice couple of weeks

The last couple of weeks have been really lovely pregnancy weeks.  Last week, we started our pre-natal (antenatal in the UK) classes.  It's a very small group of us that meet on Thursday evenings at the teacher's house.  It's really nice because it's very casual and quite social.  Because there are only 3 other couples, we cover what ever it is we want to cover (although the teacher does make sure she covers the essentials).  It's been lovely for me because I certainly don't have a social life and having other couples to share and discuss things with has been really enjoyable.
This week, my midwife was on vacation and her replacement was wonderful.  During my examination, she showed me the babies head between her two hands on my belly.  She showed both Wayne and I by directing our hands as well - it was amazing.  She was so enthusiastic about it as well (my midwife has no personality and doesn't seem to enjoy her job in any way).  It was the most enjoyable midwife appointment I've had to date - I only wish I could replace my midwife with her for good.
The most exciting thing this week is that today, we're going to have a 4D ultrasound!  We're going to get an actual peek at what our baby looks like!  I am so excited, I'm jumping out of my skin!  I just can't wait!  I'll scan the photos and post them as soon as I can.  Have to run - we're leaving for our appointment in a few minutes!

4:00 AM

It's 4AM and I can't sleep.  I slept for a little while, but got up for one of my many bathroom trips of the night, and couldn't get back to sleep.
The baby is due in just over 10 weeks.  I feel huge and assume I am because I've been asked on more than one occasion if I'm having twins.  I met a woman recently that wasn't much bigger than me.  She asked when I was due and I told her I wasn't due until May and asked her - how about you?  She replied with '2 weeks'! She was due in 2 weeks and wasn't far off from my size.  I was so embarrassed (even after she assured me she was 'carrying small').  I've gained 25lbs so far (which isn't that bad considering I was on bed rest for a month after having surgery during the 1st trimester). I took a good look in the mirror today and I'm mainly belly.  Sure, I sometimes feel like I'm beginning to resemble Jabba The Hut, but the extra weight isn't really that hard to deal with.  That being said, I hope I don't get too much bigger or I worry I may not be able to stand upright!
I'm excited to finally be into the 3rd trimester.  I really can't wait to meet our little boy.  I'm a bit scared about the birth, but more excited than anything else.  Sometimes it still feels so surreal.  I can't believe I'm going to be a mother.  It's such an amazing feeling and I feel so blessed to be starting a family with a man I truly adore.  I wish I could put into words how wonderful it feels.  I only wish I was going to be around my family and friends when the time comes so I can share it with them as well, but life isn't always perfect and I have to be grateful for all I have.  Happiness takes compromise and I'm learning that you can't have everything. Like I said before - I feel blessed to have the life I have here with Wayne and I'm looking so forward to this new phase of our life to start.